Best hygiene when going

"If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie." Wise advice from a wise friend.

Never before in the absence of hordes of toddlers or drunken people have I seen so much urine on the seats of toilets. It boggles my mind to think about two unusual occurrences seen readily throughout the men's bathrooms on this campus; and don't fret ladies, they'll be more for you later.

Oddity number one is that nearly all the guys using the facilities to expel urine from their bodies instinctively go into the stalls instead of using the urinals. This is not only unusual, but it is also a slap in the face to our creator and the person who invented the urinal. However we wound up on this planet, the male part of the species was designed to urinate standing up, and that's why the urinal was invented, to keep things tidy and quick. It's impossible to miss, why are people ignoring that?

Speaking of misses, oddity number two is a related but much more serious matter. If you walk into the stalls in most of the bathrooms on campus, you will see tiny yellow drops covering the white porcelain. It's on almost every toilet as well.

I don't know if it is a lack of training or just plain piggish behavior, but this is a ridiculous problem that should have all of our heads hanging low. Seriously, do you do these same things at home and leave the mess for your mother to clean up? No, because your mother would kill you. The janitors would probably like to fill in for your mothers too. Or maybe the other students who actually need to use the stalls would.

If you miss a little during the final phase of the process, which wouldn't be a problem if you used the urinal like most adult men, wipe it up. The toilet paper is right next to you, and chances are you don't even have to move your feet to get to it.

For the ladies out there, I can't say too much. However, I have been told by some lady friends that the women's bathrooms are, in fact, no better off. I find it hard to see how ladies miss the bowl when they have to sit down on the toilet, and there is also no excuse for them not to wipe up after themselves when they're done.

And for the love of God, people, flush the toilet. The school has actually had to put signs up reminding us to do that. Sad, really.

We're not four-year-olds anymore. If this is how our generation of college students compose themselves, I fear immensely for the future of our nation. Maybe Baruch needs to offer a class along the lines of ‘Bathroom Etiquette and Basic Human Civility.'

For all of you careless, lazy and rude people out there who can't clean up after yourselves, I sincerely hope that one day you'll be the janitors of a 'college' so you can clean up after the next generation of ungrateful children that urinate all over their public restrooms.