What people find attractive is usually relative. Some people like tall partners, others like short ones. Maybe they like to date someone with meat on their bones, and maybe they don’t. When speaking of attractiveness, the first thing people jump to is what they’re interested in on the outside, but very rarely on the inside.
Beliefs like, “guys only like bimbos” and “girls only like jerks,” are popular misconceptions that are most likely rooted in deeper issues. Jealousy aside, the two archetypes that seem to be what each gender is after may have more layers than previously considered.
The truth is that most women don’t want a jerk: most women want chivalrous men. However, there are some women who like to date bad boys with the hope that they will be able to change them. The reality is that a bad boy will always be bad.
Dominance is a big factor in these types of relationships. Women really like the cocky confidence that these men project and they place them up on a pedestal only to realize that they will never change.
Then there is the other type of guy that is a jerk to everyone else and treats her nicely, hence she feels special. The problem arises in social situations when other men are around and he defaults back into acting like a jerk to her. Mending said situation is not only difficult, but it might end friendships or the relationship itself.
There are two types of men that date like jerks. There are the men that act like jerks because they think all girls are fake and will cheat on them. Then, there are men who generally don’t really care and want to avoid any strings in their lives.
The men that date like jerks because they have had bad experiences with women in the past are harder to pierce through than those who don’t want any strings in their lives because they know the malice they are doing.
Pushing a man that is hesitant to a commitment or resistant to monogamy into a relationship is not a good idea.
Excuse me, men, but not all women are heartless.
Both of these dating types must realize that they are limiting themselves from discovering a meaningful relationship.
In terms of aggressive bad boys that might make sadist-masochists fantasies come true, there is a thin line to be crossed. The sad reality is that as Carbon mentioned, “campuses often fail to respond to college rapists, who continue to offend.”
These phenomena can be attributed to the alpha male theory, which is primitive. It stems from the theory that the alpha males are the dominant apes in the band that stand at the top of the informal hierarchy due to their strength, health and fitness. This is why in the primate world; the alpha male is able to have more sex, hence more children by extension then the beta males.
Most men see this as a direct representation of what happens with humans. They believe that the alpha jerks have more sex and beta nice guys have no sex, hence more guys try to emulate the alpha behavior.
Most alphas translate this dominant behavior by being unreactive and proving that they don’t need or care about her as much as she needs or cares about them.
Other alpha males manifest it by squeezing out all other men around the women that they are interested in, keeping her insecure in the relationship and always having to please them.
Perhaps women don’t necessarily want a passive nice guy with a sense of entitlement and passive-aggressiveness, yet that doesn’t mean that they want some patronizing pig that insults her and generally treats her like crap.
According to a study conducted by Aberdeen University on testosterone, women have a natural attraction to high levels of testosterone in men.
“High levels of testosterone are manifested by wide jawlines; body hair, competitive behavior and risk-taking. These attributes trigger a response in women,” conclude Dr. Ben Jones who was a part of the study.
The truth of the matter is that people should not have to fake their needs and true personalities. Jerks shouldn’t date girls if they want no strings, they should just enter a FWB relationship and men who want a meaningful relationship and think that the only way to secure one is by being a Stinson should take some advice from a woman friend or look at Marshall.