2008 Woodie Awards
The different shades of Fred
Fred Steinberg
Issue date: 11/12/07 Section: Opinion
The following is an open letter to Fred Thompson, 2008 presidential candidate.
Dear Fred,
Now that you have, after a year of Law & Order reruns, finally announced your presidential candidacy, it's time for a reality check. Unfortunately for you, the Republican nomination will not be decided on weighty issues such as the war in Iraq, economic uncertainties or family values. It will simply be because you are a Fred and they are John, Rudy and Mitt.
I'm afraid that Fred is just not a winning political name. There has never been a major presidential candidate named Fred. There were two Alfreds, landslide losers Smith and Landon, but Alfred is best associated with British autocracy, not American democracy. In truth, Fred is a name that often produces snickers, if not ridicule.
Whom do people think of when they hear the name Fred? Research shows Fred Flintstone tops the list. And "yabba-dabba-do" is hardly a winning campaign slogan.
Next would be Frederick the Great, King of Prussia in the 18th century who hastened the fall of the German Empire. His image is not likely to solicit votes, even in Yorkville.
Mr. (Fred) Rogers, of course, was a beloved TV personality. But how many 7-year-olds vote? Fred Astaire is considered the ultimate Fred, and you do share some of his political views and entertainment experience. But let's face it, those who worked with and knew Fred Astaire know you're no Fred Astaire.
The only partially successful American Freds in public life were Fred Seaton and Fred Vinson, hardly household names. Seaton, an appointed United States Senator, became Dwight Eisenhower's secretary of the interior and threw his hat in the ring for vice president to run with Richard Nixon in 1960.
No doubt, after a few guffaws, Dick chose a Henry (Cabot Lodge) rather than a Fred. Vinson was appointed Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court in 1946.
His death prompted Justice Felix Frankfurter to comment that his passing "is the only evidence I have ever had for the existence of God."
Think I'm exaggerating, Fred? Well, consider Fred Daniel, founder of the California-based Fred Society, which claims 5,000 members. It's dedicated to "singing the praises and condemning the misuse of the name Fred." The society struggles to promote Fred with t-shirts, bumper stickers and coffee mugs with presumably uplifting slogans. But about the best it can apparently come up with is: "Better Fred than Dead."
How successful has the society been? Well, how many Freds under 20, or 50 for that matter, do you know? Fred has not even showed up in the top 1,000 baby boy names in over five years.
So unfortunately, Fred, it just isn't going to happen for you. How do I know all this? Well sadly, I have had to deal with the same problem that you have, all my life.
Sincerely,
Fred Steinberg, professor of marketing
Baruch CAPS program
Dear Fred,
Now that you have, after a year of Law & Order reruns, finally announced your presidential candidacy, it's time for a reality check. Unfortunately for you, the Republican nomination will not be decided on weighty issues such as the war in Iraq, economic uncertainties or family values. It will simply be because you are a Fred and they are John, Rudy and Mitt.
I'm afraid that Fred is just not a winning political name. There has never been a major presidential candidate named Fred. There were two Alfreds, landslide losers Smith and Landon, but Alfred is best associated with British autocracy, not American democracy. In truth, Fred is a name that often produces snickers, if not ridicule.
Whom do people think of when they hear the name Fred? Research shows Fred Flintstone tops the list. And "yabba-dabba-do" is hardly a winning campaign slogan.
Next would be Frederick the Great, King of Prussia in the 18th century who hastened the fall of the German Empire. His image is not likely to solicit votes, even in Yorkville.
Mr. (Fred) Rogers, of course, was a beloved TV personality. But how many 7-year-olds vote? Fred Astaire is considered the ultimate Fred, and you do share some of his political views and entertainment experience. But let's face it, those who worked with and knew Fred Astaire know you're no Fred Astaire.
The only partially successful American Freds in public life were Fred Seaton and Fred Vinson, hardly household names. Seaton, an appointed United States Senator, became Dwight Eisenhower's secretary of the interior and threw his hat in the ring for vice president to run with Richard Nixon in 1960.
No doubt, after a few guffaws, Dick chose a Henry (Cabot Lodge) rather than a Fred. Vinson was appointed Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court in 1946.
His death prompted Justice Felix Frankfurter to comment that his passing "is the only evidence I have ever had for the existence of God."
Think I'm exaggerating, Fred? Well, consider Fred Daniel, founder of the California-based Fred Society, which claims 5,000 members. It's dedicated to "singing the praises and condemning the misuse of the name Fred." The society struggles to promote Fred with t-shirts, bumper stickers and coffee mugs with presumably uplifting slogans. But about the best it can apparently come up with is: "Better Fred than Dead."
How successful has the society been? Well, how many Freds under 20, or 50 for that matter, do you know? Fred has not even showed up in the top 1,000 baby boy names in over five years.
So unfortunately, Fred, it just isn't going to happen for you. How do I know all this? Well sadly, I have had to deal with the same problem that you have, all my life.
Sincerely,
Fred Steinberg, professor of marketing
Baruch CAPS program
Viewing Comments 1 - 2 of 2
Who cares about the name "Fred"
posted 11/12/07 @ 1:45 AM EST
A professor wrote this drab? I disagree with many points..I don't like Fred Thompson for other reasons, but this article is ridiculous.
ken
posted 11/17/07 @ 6:30 PM EST
Lamest of the lame. Typical prof crappy humor.
Post a Comment